Gobble Gobble!

Ahoy maties! Long time no chat; Hope your holidays were plentiful and filled with awesomeness. Mine were! The whole fam came down to the Couve to partake in the festivities and we devoured turkey and stuffing like it was going out of style. Shockingly enough, I’m actually down a couple of pounds – how you ask? Well that’s a little tale in itself…

It started a couple of weeks ago when I decided to take the plunge and sign up for L.A. Fitness since it’s only about $30 a month. Plus that pesky initiation fee, but who’s counting? Well I guess it’s pretty standard that when you sign up for a gym, a complimentary training session and fitness evaluation come with. Why pass up free? So last weekend I went in for my freebie session, and they send me to a desk where David, my trainer, is sitting down waiting for me. He stands up to shake my hand, and BAM! We are eye level. Being 5’2 (or if we’re dropping truth bombs I’m 5’1 and ¾) I don’t meet too many guys who are my height. He’s a cute little mini-me! It’s not quite as intimidating to be trained by a Keebler elf, so I’m feeling good. (And P.S. it’s completely kosher for me to make fun of him because I’m short too).

But then, being the pint-sized little devil that he is, David started dropping truth bombs of his own. As in, he made me measure my body fat content. Want to ruin your Sunday morning? Find out that you are wallowing in a big sea of excess fat! I mean, I’m aware my ass isn’t fitting into size 2 jeans, but I’m also able to live in a blissful land of denial that the second helping of homemade mac and cheese isn’t killing me slowly. The wakeup call hit me hard, but not as hard as the 20 minute workout that came next. I don’t know how that tiny sorcerer managed to warp my muscles into limp piles of Jell-0, but he did. He had me doing wall sits while bouncing medicine balls, holing lunges for far longer than should be acceptable, and planks that made obscenities fly inadvertently out of my mouth. It wasn’t until about 4 days later until I could sit down on the toilet without lowering myself slowly while weeping.

It didn’t take long to convince me that this guy was legit and if I really want to transform myself, I’d need some accountability. (Although I probably could have done without him pointing out the girls in the gym he’d like to “have relations” with – we get it. They’re hot. Is this supposed to be motivation?) But I did it. I made a 12 month commitment to get my ass kicked twice a week – and I dropped quite a pretty penny to do it. For that amount of money, I better look BANGIN’ in a year’s time. So between my personal training sessions over the last week and my long walks gearing up for the ½ marathon on Sunday, I actually managed to lose weight over the holiday week. If that’s not BOMB DOT COM, I don’t know what is!

So next Monday I will be writing this blog from the Vegas Airport, hopefully relaying you with details of how I made the marathon my bitch! I’m out to buy some water resistant socks tomorrow and I’m then I’m raring to go! Have an excellent week and I’ll check in with you soon : )