ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Sleeping. Snoozing. Nodding off. Catching some Z’s. Getting some shut eye. Whatever you want to call it, that’s my new obsession. And I can’t get enough of it. Literally. I am in bed by 9:30 every night like an old lady, and it’s still not early enough for me. I’m embarrassed to admit this – but last Friday, I conked out at 5 pm. No joke. What was meant to be a little disco nap before dinner turned into a 16 hour all nighter. What is wrong with me!?!?!? WHERE IS MY ENERGY???

Last night promised to be a little better – I crawled into bed at 8:30, psyched to be asleep an extra hour early, but I was soon joined by three gentlemen, and two of them happen to be bed hogs. (I know this has the potential to get awesome, but sadly two of the dudes were of the feline and canine variety). So I woke up this morning with leg and neck cramps from being curled up in a weird ball because Rex has to sleep like a diagonal starfish.

But where am I going with this? I’ll tell you. My awesome work out plans went DOWN THE POOPER! The only thing I could muster last week was boot camp, and that’s because my workout buddies would have dropkicked me in the ovaries had I missed. By the by, my boot instructor had her baby this weekend! And even she showed up to boot camp on Thursday with a kid halfway out her cooter, so I REALLY had no excuse. AND SHE WORKED OUT. It made the rest of us look like pansies, but what are you gonna do? When a mean pregnant lady says run, YOU RUN. And bless her heart, when we grunt every obscenity in the book at her and tell her we’re going to run over her with a pickup truck, she just smiles and tells us to do ten more. I’m hoping her maternal instincts kick in soon and her urge to nurture becomes more prevalent. I’m not holding my breath.

So sadly, I’m at the same weight because I could not get my ass in gear for the life of me. Does anyone have any brilliant ideas or suggestions!?!?! It’s challenging to drag myself from the couch to the dinner table after work. The only plus side to this is that I’m usually too tired to eat!(I didn't think that was humanly possible for me). So I’ve got to find some balance soon, or I’m going to become the most boring lethargic person on the planet. Maybe I’ll start bringing my workout clothes with me and pop over to the gym in the middle of grading papers. Or maybe I’ll multitask and do jumping jacks while teaching. That’s not weird, right?

UUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH – I just looked at the clock, and I only have an hour til bed time and I still have to figure out how to make Beowulf interesting to high school seniors. Maybe we’ll act out some battle scenes all medieval style – ya know, work in some jousting for cardio. I’ll let you know how that goes… So sadly, this is me signing off so I can drag my tired hiney to bed soon. I’m hoping this is temporary. Sweet lord of everything holy, it better be temporary. So this is an extremely tired Emily Corak signing off – wishing you all pleasant dreams and more energy than I have.