Got Jesus on My Neck-o-lace-ace-ace

So it’s been a pretty rockin’ week! I’m down 2.3 pounds, bringing up the total to almost 13 big ones. I’m feeling pretty damn proud of myself! Slow and steady wins the race, and I’m just happy that I’m still on the course. I’ve attempted some weight loss stints before, but after a month or two, I tend to veer off track and get distracted by something shiny. But look at me, sticking it out and being awesome. I made it to the gym five times this week: a circuit class, a spin class, TWO Zumba classes, and a walk/jog on the treadmill. I actually jogged a total of 9 minutes out of 30 – this may be no big deal to some of you, but in the past, I would have sacrificed a small puppy if it got me out of running. I hate running. I hate it more than when people mix up the words good and well, and if you know me at all, you know bad grammar makes me want to stab someone. There’s something truly evil about running; in the past, I used to get winded after about 30 seconds. This is not one of those exaggerated statements like when people say, “I ate a million cupcakes.” No joke, after 30 seconds of running I’d usually be keeled over and ready to pass out. So when I got off that treadmill last night, huffing and puffing, beat red and loaded with pit stains, it was the proudest I’ve been of myself in a long time.

I wish I could take all the credit for my awesome week, but there was a greater force at work, and her name is Kesha. I know she spells her name with a fucking dollar sign in the middle, but that’s dumb and I won’t do it. I have a love/hate relationship with this pop star – mostly, I love her stupid songs and I hate myself because of it. It’s true that she’s trashy and looks like she needs a shower ALL THE TIME, but I defy anyone not to shake their groove thing when “Tik Tok” comes on the radio. I’ve had her music on repeat all week and I find myself dancing in the car, when I’m washing the dishes, and in between classes. I can’t stop. When I’m listening to her music, I want to work out faster and harder. There’s something about her that just fills me with energy (and self loathing), but mostly the energy thing. So I’d like to tribute these 2.3 pounds to Kesha and the rest of the artists on my new playlist. I’m going to let you in on my workout playlist, and I’ll be damned if it doesn’t rock your world like it did mine. I’m pretty sure that if everyone had this playlist, the diet industry would be obsolete. It’s that good.

Emily’s Rockin’ Playlist of Awesomeness

1.Kesha – Tik Tok
2.Cee Lo Green – Fuck You (There’s a more PG version if you’re offended by the
word 'fuck')
3.System of a Down – Toxicity
4.Michael Jackson – Beat It
5.Queen – Fat Bottom Girls
6.Rihanna – Please don’t stop the Music
7.Incubus – Anna Molly
8.Kesha – We are who we are
9.Foo Fighters – Best of You
10.Billy Joel – Uptown Girl
11.Guns N’ Roses – Sweet Child O’ Mine
12.Usher – Caught Up
13.Wicked Soundtrack – Defying Gravity (don’t knock it; musicals are awesome)
14.Akon – Smack That (this one’s for you, Meg)
15.Beach Boys – Wouldn’t it be Nice

So that’s my brainchild of a playlist. If you have a better one, (good luck), I’d love to get suggestions. That’s all I’ve got for you today, so have a splendid week and go shake what your mama gave you!

* On a random and unrelated note, if you want a reference for some fantastic recipes and reviews, check out my friend Julie’s blog: www.subtleseasonings.com